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"You owe us a lot of money-"Gloria was trying to speak through the ball gag."Take that off of her, Carol."She did so and Gloria blurted out, "Twenty-four-thousand-three-hundred-and-fifty-five dollars! That's how much I owe you, sir." Good, now shut the fuck up. Let's see — I'd say five dollars an hour is a suitable fee for a pathetic whore like you ... that'll be..." He did the mental math in his head. "Four-thousand-eight-hundred-and-seventy-one hours of service ... now the occasional bonus for exemplary performance, double-time for particularly inconvenient sessions, and 'management fees' from loaning you out to other members of our House could lower that quite a bit, but you're still looking at a hell of a lot of time being my complete and total bitch. If we figure twenty hours a week, roughly, then you're looking at about..." Harry calculated, "two-hundred-forty-three weeks, a little under five years — to pay off what you owe me and my House."Where do you work?" he asked."I'm a. Chocolate is God’s way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby.If you’re going down a river at 2 MPH and your canoe loses a wheel, how much pancake mix would you need to re-shingle your roof?Say Thanks to jimq21Lovable Inflatable Christmas LouiseAs a joke, my brother used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true, because every Christmas morning, although Jay’s kids stockings were overflowed, his poor panty hose hung sadly empty.One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll. Of course, they don’t sell those things at Wal-Mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. If you’ve never been in an X-rated store, don’t go. You’ll only confuse yourself. I was there almost three hours saying things like, “What does this do?” “You’re kidding me!” “Who owns that?”Finally I made it to.
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