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I felt like shrinking down underneath the bar and hiding.The man busied himself with his phone and I made a concerted effort to avoid looking his way. I tried resurrecting the conversation that I had rehearsed with George. What was coming out of my mouth was gibberish. Nothing like the carefully crafted speech that I had planned which laid out my wants and options for our next blow job scenario. I decided to go to the ladies room in an attempt to get my act together. I told George what I was going to do.“Great. While you are away I am going to introduce ourselves to this man you are obviously smitten with,” said George.“Don’t you dare, I feel like a complete idiot and don’t want to compound the feeling by us, or you, talking to him,” I responded.“Look, you are obviously smitten by this man and have already expressed your desire to ‘do him’ so let me do some exploring. It will probably amount to nothing but let me give it a try.”With that George almost pushed me off my stool. I stood. ”Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!” He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.-- Steven WrightWhen will all the rhetorical questions end?We have mileage, yardage and footage. Why don’t we have inchage?Bumper Sticker:If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you.The other day, I was walking my dog around my building ... on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.-- Steven WrightStudies show that 100% of those who advocate abortion are people who already have been born.What’s dumb? Directions on toilet paper.What’s dumber than that? Reading them.Even dumber? Reading them and learning something.Dumbest of all? Reading them and having to correct something you’ve been doing wrong.Some time ago, there was this artist, who worked from a studio in his home. He specialized in nudes, and had been working on what he thought would be a masterpiece for several months now.As usual, his model reported, and after exchanging the usual greetings.
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