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“Well it’s like this, I’ve got 9 kids already and I don’t need the wife pregnant again. What’ll I do, I got enough.”“I can put your wife on the pill” the doc says.“The what.”“You know, the contraceptive pill. But you must wear a rubber for a month till she becomes protected”“A what? A rubber what?”“You obviously haven’t a clue what I’m on about, here duck into this alley, I happen to have on one means I’ll show you how to wear it. And remember, don’t take it off.”So the doc gets him to drop his dacks, then proceeds to put a Durex rubber on for him, then sends him on his way.Some months later, the doctor sees Paddy coming towards him, “good day, Paddy, how things.”Paddy charges up and belts the doc on the nose, “you and your bloody contra-whatever’s and flaming rubber whatsits, the wife’s bloody pregnant again.”“She shouldn’t be, I told you to wear a rubber.”“I did, in fact I’ve still got it on.”“You what! show me.So Paddy drops his dacks, the doc looks and says, “you’ve cut the end. She looked so tiny in front of me. She turned her head, looking up at me and said thank you. But the way she said it, implied she wasn’t thanking me for getting the soda. She had a smirk on her face as I grabbed her a cup of ice to put the warm soda in. She then headed out back to join the kids in the pool.A few minutes later I made myself another stiff drink and headed outside to join them. “You kids want cheeseburgers or Chinese food for lunch?” In unison, they all yelled “Chinese!” Good, now I don’t have to cook lunch I thought to myself. Since there was a good hour before lunch time I decided to join them in the pool. I noticed Melissa on the diving board getting ready to do a backflip. Her ass seemed to be giving me a vertical smile. I found myself staring and Becky seemed to notice.“Hey, why don’t you take a picture? It will last longer” Becky said laughing at me.“Hey that is not a bad idea. How about if I take pictures of you all doing crazy dives and stuff?”“Yea, cool. Ok go.
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