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I told her to go into my cramped bathroom and take a good warm shower, dry off completely, and put on the sweats. She complied silently, and as she did, I heated up a can of soup and dug out some warm bedding. She was still shivering after the shower, but the soup and a cup of instant cocoa helped. After eating, she took the bedding and lay down on the ratty couch along one wall of my combination kitchen-dining room-parlor, and began sobbing again, this time quietly. I went into my eight by eight bedroom and sacked out for several hours before getting up at ten and heading out to my other part-time job. When I left, Dena was sleeping restlessly. I found myself wondering If I could afford to lend her any money, and whether she had anyplace to go if I did.When I got home at 7:30, she was sleeping soundly and snoring like a sawmill. I made myself a baloney sandwich and opened myself a beer.This was Thursday morning, and I wouldn't have to go to work again at either of my jobs until. I almost drowned myself in the shower this morning while rinsing my hair, I was thinking about you so hard I forgot to inhale. It’s like that a lot of the time, my mind keeps returning to days when everything was good and all I had to do is close my eyes to remember what love feels like. Now I’m starving for that feeling, the sustenance of emotion is non-existent when you’re not here, the bed is cold and my mind is blank with feeling. I miss you eternally, and I’ll wait for you longer than that. You know that I love you, right? yours, Raven To the best I ever had, The twisted knife tears at my stomach as my barb-wired soul spills out onto the floor. The pain I feel is immeasurable. Never did I believe this was possible, that there would be a time I should just give up, that I should accept the inevitable- this is not who I am. My love for you is absolute, and now I find my pain with you is the same. It’s almost funny to realize that emotion could be so much like a revolving door..
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