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With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he’d sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs... “Your badge, officer, show him your f*cking BADGE!!”✧ ✧ ✧This one is from TLSBThe Lone ranger rode up to a ranch house and the rancher exclaimed, “A masked man! You must be an outlaw!” “No Sir,” replied the Lone Ranger, I only wear this mask because of the coronavirus pandemic.”✧ ✧ ✧Say thanks to NipSC4328 for this one:Don’t eat chicken sandwiches, no matter what!!A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends ... Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They discovered that they both brought chicken sandwiches every day! This went on all through the fourth and fifth grades, until one day he noticed that her sandwich wasn’t a chicken sandwich. He said, ‘Hey, how come you’re not eating. Or, look at me twenty years ago, standing in a backstage dressing room,surrounded by smoke and mirrors, feather boas, false eyelashes. Thegirl in the mirror, upon closer inspection, is not really a girl atall. Beneath the pancake makeup, the foundation, the rouge, the eyes,so alluring at first, are somewhat dull and dazed.A dark silent figure laces me into a corset."Do I look okay?" You look fine." Are you sure." Absolutely." I feel a little, uh, over-exposed this way." Just go with it, have fun with it." A dry, heartless chuckle.I was always told to follow your heart... and now look at me... a dumbblonde with big tits. Wiggling into a tight-fitting dress, drinkingmartinis, giggling and flirting, batting my lashes, doing my lips.Drawing the stares of all these men; working hard to keep theirattention. My point is this: you have to be very careful when somebodysays, follow your heart. You never know where it?s going to lead.That?s something I learned the hard way, honey. Now excuse me,.
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