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He is, however, not lying, though he isn’t correct either. ‘Well, Duane…’ I start, taking in a long breath and thinking of how best to handle the situation. My first thought is- LIE! Then I think lying would prove less of an interest to these people. No, they don’t want some stammering story about how difficult it was for me to stop my blanky twiddling and thumb sucking. This was a family out for blood at all costs. They were not going to be satiated with flushed cheeks, They needed meat ripped from bones and knockdown drag-out family quarrels that would end only at next year’s Christmas dinner. They weren’t going to let up. ‘Well, you see, I still have a ‘gaga’…’ I was in deep shit. All eyes had turned to me, the sound of forks clanking down on plates when the television has just reported a bombing or a brand new episode of Friends. My grandmother pursed her lips and folded her napkin. My husband tried to start a mild mannered conversation with the waiter. My brother and sister, of. . Toby, w-when are we going to make love?”Toby smiled at her. “It all depends whose impatience wins.”“Or who is the least unworried about parental reaction.”Toby’s smile broadened. “I could put money on that.”“Beast!” She looked thoughtful for a moment. “I’ll talk to Mum when things have died down a bit.”“OK.”“What about getting married?”“I think I ought to have found myself a job first so that I can afford the rent on somewhere to live and to support my wife in the manner to which she is accustomed.”Allie giggled. “Pompous prig!”Toby nodded solemnly even though his eyes were dancing. “Kiss me again. It might soften my resolve.”Allie did so with alacrity and enthusiasm. Toby was immediate to respond. At last they both drew back and looked at each other.“The day before yesterday to both your questions judging by that,” said Toby.“I wish!” snorted Allie.They both tightened their hold on each other.“Oh, my Toby!” whispered Allie. “My precious darling Toby.” She paused. “It’s not just you.
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