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But my peaceful amble round the aisles is interrupted when I bump into Monica, an old school friend I’d never been that keen on.She natters on while I do the nodding in that female form of verbal masturbation.Monica has a glamorous sort of social life and she’s shopping now for her trendy house party.After I’ve endured her verbal climax, and possibly as recognition for my endurance, she invites me to her party and then suddenly leaves me with my groceries.When I get home Jez is in front of the telly; wearing just her knickers and tee shirt.Over her shoulder, without even taking her eyes off the screen she calls ‘Dan rang to say he will be home late tonight. Why don’t he read me a bedtime story any more?’Instead of inventing an explanation, I correct her grammar. ‘Why doesn’t, not why don’t.’ I retort, proceeding to the kitchen.I start to put the shopping away before the frozen things begin defrosting and suddenly she alongside me; “I had one of those wet dreams again mom.”‘Did you. Is Jeff in?" Ashley. What you did for Sandy was so sweet. She's on cloud nine. Thank you so much." I was happy to do it. She's a really good kid."Thinking about it brought a smile to my face."Just a second, I'll get Jeff."Having to wait for him didn't change my mind."Hi." Hi, Jeff. You doing anything tonight?" Not really. We'll probably watch a movie here." Good. I want to take you to a party." What kind of party?" he asked."The kind I go to." Wouldn't I be kind of out of place there?" he asked."Not at all. You'd be with me." I'm, stunned. Is this like a date?" No, not at all. This is a date." Okay. Are you sure? Won't this kind of hurt your status?" I won't be losing anything important enough to me to worry about. Have your Mom, have your Dad, I'll be over there to help you pick out something to wear."Jeff cleaned up pretty good. Put a tie and jacket on the boy and he looked almost, cute.When it came to conversation, my idiot savant wasn't fully up to the task. Small talk was still.
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