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Female JokesWhat’s the definition of the perfect woman?She’s three feet tall, has a round hole for a mouth and her head is flat so you can put cocktails on it.The sports model has pull-back ears and her teeth fold in.The economy model - she fucks all night and at midnight she turns into a roast beef sandwich and a six pack.Three old ladies were sitting on a park bench when a flasher walked up to them and displayed his endowments. The first old lady had a stroke, the second old lady had a stroke, but the third old lady’s arms were too short to reach.A man meets up with an old roommate whom he has not seen for many years.The roommate has had a sex-change operation.“Was it painful?”, asks the former.“No, not really” says the second.“How about when they cut off your dick?”“No that really wasn’t the worst of it.”“Really?” says the first.“How about when they had to create the new hole? That must have been painful.”“No the worst part was when they stuck the straw in my ear and sucked out. “We are going to have some fun today my pet.” “Yes Mistress.” I can’t help but let my mind wonder to what my Mistress could be getting. It takes me a second but I realize that my Mistress is looking at me as if she is waiting for something “Well?” Oh no, I must have blanked when she asked me something. “Ummmm yes Mistress.” She grabs my hair and asks, “Did my pet not hear me? I asked if you wanted to play now.” She stares at me and I can’t keep eye contact with her. I am saved by the bell as the person behind the counter comes back in. He is a guy a bit taller than me at 6’3” and in his mid-thirties. A scary smirk comes over my Mistress’s face. I feel a shiver go down my spine. “Excuse me sir can I chat with you? Stay here my pet I will be right back.” My Mistress and the man leave and I am left in store alone with my cock throbbing in my shorts. My Mistress and the man come back in and they both are smiling at me, my Mistress walks past me down an isle marked lube and the man.
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