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) So when my friends made cracks about us skinny dipping in the hot tub it pissed me off, because I knew it wasn't EVER gonna happen. Must be why I spend so much time reading erotic stories on the Web - to live vicariously through all the people who seem to do stuff that exists, in my life, only in the realm of imagination.One Friday night after the kids went to bed I grabbed my bathing suit and jumped into the tub. I turned the jets all the way up and let them do their thing to my back. The kids had left the lights on downstairs, and I hadn't bothered to turn them off since the neighbour's lights were all on too -- there wasn't any prospect of privacy anyway. After really getting in to the massage the jets were giving me, I opened my eyes and was surprised to see all our lights off. Then my wife came out to join me. Even wearing her very conservative one-piece bathing suit, she wanted as little chance as possible to be seen - no surprise there.We chatted about our week and about the. " The assembled crowd sang as thebirthday girl cringed behind her voluminous blonde hair, "happybirthday to you... To you... To you... To you to you to you... Toyou... To you... To you to you to you!" Rachel giggled at the crowd'suse of the tune of Cyndi Lauper's hit 'Girl Just Wanna Have Fun' toextend her embarrassment further, before brushing her hair out of herface and blowing out the 29 candles that had been placed on her cake-which was, of course, shaped exactly like the hat she and all herfriends wore as part of their uniform."Oh my god, thank you all so much!" Rachel squeaked."Speech!" Natalie yelled, laughing as Rachel replied with a stern glareand a middle finger."Oh, alright then..." Rachel laughed. "Thank you all so much forcoming, it really means a lot to know that I have such great friends-no, such a great FAMILY." I think that's my cue for the next song," Stuart- the party's DJ- saidwith a chuckle, making everyone present cheer as the opening bars ofSister Sledge's 'We.
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