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Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. ... A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of." ... The congregation of 500 members only has seven last names in the church directory. ... people think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy. ... the baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized washtub. ... the collection plates are hubcaps from a '56 Chevy. ... instead of bells, you are called to service by a duck call. ... the minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks. ... the communion wine is Boone's Farm "Strawberry Hill". ... that "Thou shall not covet" thing applies to huntin' dogs, too.This one is compliments of Earl JohnA young couple, were just back from their honeymoon, and settling in to a life of married bliss when ... The first Monday morning back, the young wife suddenly slaps her husband, very hard, as they lay there sleeping. While they. . And other things.Regis was glad to see his mistress; he jumped up trying to lick her face, barking excitedly."Okay down boy" she laughed. She ruffled his head and neck and went into the kitchen to get his food.While he was eating she went and got out of her skiing clothes just wrapping a fleece robe around her. She sat down in a leather rocker and turned on the TV. Flipping through the channels she didn't find anything she wanted to watch. She was about to get up and get her pad and pens, maybe try to write some lyrics to a new song when Regis came padding in and laid his head on her knee. Those big dark eyes were looking up at her pleadingly."What ya want boy" she asked? A little whine and he put one paw up on her knee and shoved like he was trying to move her legs apart. She had to laugh; he was like a teenage boy trying to coax his girlfriend to at least let him touch her. The remembrance of that flashing tongue in her pussy made her open her legs a little, just to see what he.
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