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”Derrick howled and whined, “You shot me, you hick town asshole. I am going to sue your ass.”“You will need a police report to do that, and what are you going to say, ‘I was trespassing, assaulted his son, and threatened his houseguest?’ By the way, the hick town police chief is my cousin.”Dad threw him a dish towel and told him to, “Wrap this towel around your foot and get the hell out of here before I decide your balls will make a better target. Take a right at the end of the street. There is a clinic a couple of miles down on your right.”Grabbing the towel, Derrick clenched his teeth, “Okay, I’m leaving. You can keep the bitch. There are plenty more where she came from.” Derrick hobbled out of the kitchen door, leaving a bloody sneaker print every other step he took.The next day I had a call from the hospital. It was Delores, the nurse from the emergency room at Memorial Hospital. She sounded in a bit of a panic as she started to tell me how Derrick had tricked a Candy Striper into. We stopped at dusk."That was a blast," grinned Jack as we finished our game. "Do you have to leave right away, or can you have a couple drinks with us, Stan?" Have I ever refused a drink, especially from such a gracious loser?" I laughed. "Let's get to the watering hole!"We had a couple beers and retold old war stories from our glory days. I found myself thinking what a good time I was having and I would have to get together with the Jack and Steve more often. I started the two-hour trip home around 9 PM.As I got closer to home, I felt my mood slowly sour. Brandy would be in a rage when I walked through the door. I would have to deal with her anger and mulled over the best method to lessen, or deflect, her ire. I laughed to myself when I realized I was considering the impossible. She would be livid."Where in Goddamn Hell have you been?" were her words of greeting as I ambled into the living room. "I told you that fucking banquet was important to me and for you to be there by six!".
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