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Every 10 minutes, she would sarcastically say, "Re-calc-u-lating." You would think that she could be nicer. It was like she could barely tolerate me. She would let go with a deep sigh and then tell me to make a U-turn at the next light. Then if I made a right turn instead. Well, it was not a good relationship...When I get really lost now, I call my wife and tell her the name of the cross streets and while she is starting to develop the same tone as Gypsy, the GPS lady, at least she loves me.To be perfectly frank, I am still trying to learn how to use the cordless phones in our house. We have had them for 4 years, but I still haven't figured out how I lose three phones all at once and have to run around digging under chair cushions, checking bathrooms, and the dirty laundry baskets when the phone rings.The world is just getting too complex for me. They even mess me up every time I go to the grocery store. You would think they could settle on something themselves but this sudden "Paper. “We get down in the front of the sanctuary, and Jake says: ‘Wait a minute, you haven’t done this. I can’t perform the ceremony.’ Well, we’ll ask him next time. It’s more likely something we haven’t thought about which makes it damn hard to live together.” Not that there weren’t things she had thought about which would make it damn hard to live together.“Someday, you’ll have to give me a list of the foods you don’t eat,” she said. “And do you mind adding a pressure cooker to the shopping list, maybe a better pot for cooking rice?”“Sure, and another wastebasket, I’d think. You probably need one on your side.”“Well,” she admitted, “your additions are going to be cheaper than mine. I thought of a cookbook. I don’t know how to cook many things. But I want to wait until after the ceremony. Mama is likely to give me one.”“Well, women have more than one cookbook. Have you ever seen the shelf in Gladys’s kitchen?”“You’re not marrying Gladys. Get very clear about that. I’m not going to exhaust.
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