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March 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.2. May 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.3. May 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.4. May 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. We don’t have a Code 3.5. June 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.6. June 14: Moved a, ‘CAUTION - WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.7. June 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.8. June 23: When a. Sometimes they let themselves be caught. This was risky, for one day theymight meet a fisherman who actually knew how to deal with mermaids; but thatrisk only enhanced the thrill. And what a thrill it was! A net enveloped them,or hooks snagged them by the hair. Then, after struggling enough to make itall believable, they gave up and let themselves be pulled weeping and tremblinginto some fool's boat. When they'd convinced the poor dunce that these were helpless females completelyat his mercy, they complimented him on his fishing skills and made him an offer.Each would give him one wish--whatever he wanted! Or, just as good, each wouldgive him herself! He only had to swear an oath to let them go . . . let themgo . . . let them go. As they spoke, and as they fixed his eyes with theirs,he fell under their spell, and soon they had him. He would untangle them fromthe net, or remove the hooks, or whatever--then just sit unresisting whilethey punctured his throat with their teeth. It was.
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