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It's been a good, loving marriage, but the spark has certainly faded. One night we were brainstorming what we could do to bring a little excitement back into our marriage. When I suggested that she have intercourse with a stranger while I watched, we both thought it was worth a shot.We went out to bars to find a stranger who might be willing to take part in our little experiment. And while my wife and I are alike in so many ways, we soon learned that the one area in which we differ is in our taste in men. I was looking for someone of medium height, but rugged. The kind of fellow who might have been on my college lacrosse squad. My wife, however, wanted a black man. As is often the way with a marriage, this would take some compromise on both our parts.The way we lured our gentleman caller into the fold was simple. I sat at a table with two small flags, one red, the other green. My wife would circulate through the bar and flirt with men she found attractive. When a man returned her. Well unreadable to most, after three millennia McElligott had learned to read the most subtle facial expressions.“Sorry, old warhorse, but that is what Admirals do. Inspect things. They did that even back on Earth when both of us had no idea we would once hold that rank ourselves.”“And are as useless as tits on a boar. Inspections are a waste of time. Either they are ready or they are not, and they better be ready when I show up. Inspection or not.”“Inspections have their purpose and are an older tradition than we old farts. Besides the USS Baghdad has won the Ship Shape award many times, so the affair will be a short one.”“I just came from reprimanding two marines for extreme unprofessional conduct. I don’t like seeing this kind of behavior from any member of the armed forces, but Marines?”“Oh good lord, those poor bastards are going to commit seppuku or something.”“Suicide is a coward’s way out. My Marines are not cowards, however, they volunteered for a year duty at Lee’s.
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