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Don’t get me wrong. If needs be, I wouldn’t think twice about sending any one or all three to St Peter’s judgment. But, given a choice, I’d rather hang them out to dry and then let the law handle them. If Inspector Richards and the entire Department of Justice got their collective rocks off by taking them in, more power to them, just get the trash off my mountain.I started by making sure that I made enough of a trail for even a rookie to follow. It had to be obvious, but not too obvious. I wasn’t sure how experienced these guys were in tracking or bushcraft. I hoped that they were clueless, but I wasn’t going to count on it. If any of them had experience, they may get suspicious and not follow my game plan.I knew when they were starting to get close. The birds and insects got quiet, and I started to hear human type sounds. But I hung around long enough to get a good idea of just how close. I was waiting at a sharp bend in the trail when fatso came creeping around. At first, he didn’t. Three lanes of freely flowing traffic can move you a fair distance & keep the stress level down, but as the morning wore on and the inescapable roadworks continued to narrow the road & reduce the speed he found the going tedious and the scenery boring. He decided there was nothing more frustrating than being caught in a snarl on a motorway and after inching your way forward for 20 minutes finding the way ahead was clear and never knowing what the holdup had been. In the end, it got to him so much that he abandoned his original plan to head for Bath and instead turned South at the first available exit. And promptly became lost in a variety of fashions.You could choose to blame it on his natural instinct to turn right rather than left (as do all drivers from North America or the Continent), or a desire to get away from the trappings of civilisation & pursue a quieter existence, or simply sheer happenstance. What is indisputable is that within five minutes of leaving the motorway, he.
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