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.. those aren’t love handles, they’re spare tires ... he’s got to hold it or it’ll go limp! ... yeah, right, a bikini and an C-section scar ... Christ, if they had put in any more silicone she’d fall over...”For a second I thought it was just me. Maybe I was just too dumb to figure it out. But I looked around the room and met incredulous stares from the other guys. Without question, all the men had been transported to the Twilight Zone. And the women to the Comedy Club.“ ... men are such pigs! ... I wouldn’t touch our mailman with a ten-foot pole ... that’s not a cock, it’s a mutation! ... who’d get a tattoo there? ... well, no wonder! She’s so coked up she couldn’t remember the lines with the script in her hands ... and clapped up to boot...”Thank heavens the abomination was as mercifully short as it was mercilessly bad. But all the women loved it. After a final rousing chorus of “Men are such pigs!” they trooped off together to the bathroom. The remaining six of us were left, simply. I had not yet developed my middle age paunch that would have hidden my triangle of hair from that angle.At first my stomach did flips, I could not believe that I had so carelessly exposed myself to my son like that. Then while laying down next to my passed out hubby in my sheer nightie it also dawned on me that little Ricky was the only person to have shown any interest in what I had hidden in years really. I really did not sleep well that night at all, just too many emotions but I do have a clear memory of what emotion won out. Anger at my husband for becoming a drunk, anger at being ignored, frustration, the sexual kind, anger at my husband for being the kind of drunk that has to be hauled off to bed by his 14 year old son. I think that this was the point more instinctive then anything at that point where I decided that if my husband wanted the bottle more than me and my son wanted to look. My quiet revenge would be to let him look.The next night and every night after my husband.
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