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‘What changed in the last six months?’ I asked. My argument fell on deaf ears and ended with the sarcastic comment that the single gold bar on my shoulder meant that a lowly second lieutenant should salute and say, ‘Yes Sir’ to orders when they are received. Three weeks later I was in Germany. I walked into the commander’s outer office and found a staff sergeant reading the newspaper and sipping coffee. I explained that I was reporting in and asked if I should report now or come back later. The Sergeant looked me over, chuckled and said, ‘Hang tight, Lieutenant. I think they want to meet you now and get it over with.’ He walked into the next room and came out a minute later. He shook his head sadly and pointed to the open door. I marched in and saw a captain and a first sergeant sitting at a conference table on either side of a lieutenant colonel. I took a position of attention, saluted since I was reporting for my new duty, even though we were indoors, and did the military thing,. The dog was tied to the telephone system’s ground wire with a steel chain and collar.2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose.3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the number was called.4. After a couple of jolts, the dog would start moaning and then pee.5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to ring.Which demonstrates that some problems CAN be fixed by pissing and moaning.Thought you’d like to know.These are compliments of cbarge... FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY, AS WELL AS THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH:1. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA ... FLOOR.2. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.3. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?4. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE.5. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, “WHERE’S THE SELF- HELP SECTION? SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.6. WHAT.
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