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”“So, what you going to do about the Chloe & Lorraine situation?”We were sat on a sofa in the pub, I was the only customer late on Sunday afternoon, Jenny was the only member of staff, Mary was on the piano, noodling away at some Thelonious Monk tune. I had my milk, Jenny had a large Cheeky Vimto (blue WKD and port).“Jenny, I’m in love with Chloe, it’s not just the sex, although as you know, that was stunning, we’ve just clicked. I’ve spent the last few hours at her house, just doing revision work. It was wonderful just being in her company, no sexy talk, no fooling around, just working, and it was like being with an old friend.”“Was her mum there, because that would influence your behaviour I imagine.”“She was there when we arrived, but she went out to the shops and left us alone. She clearly has no idea what Chloe was up to last night.”“Have you met her mum before?”“No, never. She’s had two jobs for the last few years, so hasn’t been able to attend parents’ evenings.”“What’s she. Another nerd from school insisted he was going to be something called a Draenei futa. With all the hype how could you not go.A very boring hour long talk about the future and humanities role in shaping the earth was followed by a twenty minute session where they hooked you up to a computer by little stick on wires and asked a ton of seemingly useless questions, such as “If you witnessed a child drop sticky candy would you a. Dust it off and tell them it was fine, b. Buy them a new one, c. Laugh, or d. Not care, walk away.” Or even better, just, “Pink or black?” That isn't even a question.Once that was all over you had to fill out a paper describing in great detail your dream new self, or simply marking the box, same as now, plus the, “Would you change anything?” Question. Finally they put that all in a little plastic box and said they would call you if any more was needed and send you updates every year on their progress.Six months later they company went bankrupt and became a funny.
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