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Ive got half a bottle of Ukrainian vodka gushing through my veins (this is strong stuff. 140 proof it says on the bottle) and a new century/ a new MILLENNIUM hurtling towards me by the second. (November 1999. Cant you just feel that pessimistic old fart Nostradamus breathing down your neck?) Ok so that wasnt too difficult really. Three pleasant little paragraphs to set up the scene (time place and person). A bit clumsy and laboured no doubt but I can always tidy them up in the morning along with all the other debris of my drunkenness: 2 empty fag packets/ 4 coffee mugs/ 1 creamy-white bra/ a pair of burgundy knickers (Im not always the most co-ordinated girl)/ several green scrumpled pound notes (which incidentally theyll no longer accept in England)/ my new black hip-huggers (only SLIGHTLY flared)/ a couple of Michael Moorcocks Jerry Cornelius novels and half a slice of buttered toast and strawberry jam that I forgot all about till just this minute. So what have I been doing for the. I always loved digging around for Civil War artifacts and didn’t miss having boys chase me around. It wasn’t until I was in high school that I started to blossom. I only did the Miss Hancock County Pageant to make my mamma happy. When I won, that took me to Raleigh for the Miss North Carolina Pageant. When I won that, I ended up in Atlantic City for the Miss America Pageant. I got first runner-up and enough scholarship money to get me into Duke, which brought me here tonight.”“Wow! That’s quite a story. It’s almost like you were destined to be here tonight with a Nebraska farm boy who loves digging in the dirt just to find out what’s down there.” “What about you? How did you end up on a cliff overlooking the Pacific with a girl from North Carolina? Did you plan this somehow, to get to this dig and to find the last Shaman?”“Like I said, I have always liked to dig in the dirt. There were plenty of artifacts around Scotts Bluff and Whitney to discover. I remember hanging.
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