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But then, that's when you met the most beautiful woman in your entire life.A mature lady, with long flowing blonde hair, and really big boobies.And I mean, like, REALLY HUGE BOOBIES.Like, they were some serious honkers.A real set of badonkers.She was packing some dobonhonkeros.Massive dohoonkabhankaloos.Big old tonhongerekoogers.Gigantic bonkhonagahoogsHumongous hungolomghononoloughongous.So, anyway, yeah, that was the day you went through your puberty REALLY damn fast.Turns out, she was the birthday girl's mom.She was preparing to add the final touches for the birthday party and was preparing the cake, when she noticed you and asked if you could spare a hand to help her out.As you helped her finish her cake, she wondered why you weren't out there playing with all the girls.You explained to her that girls had cooties.She laughed, "Well, I'm a girl too. How come you aren't afraid of me?" Because you're really pretty." You admitted unabashedly."Well, isn't that just adorable?" She. ” After a moment of silence I turned and looked at Amanda. “I never cheated on your Mom. She filed for a divorce the next day and I told her I would pay for it if I got to keep my retirement. She agreed and …. I figured that she would have told you.” “She just said that she was tired of some things and gave you an ultimatum and you walked out.” “Close enough, I guess. Anyhow, the court declared it final on Monday. And despite what she thinks or says, I still have not been with any other woman. I guess that is the irony of it all. I leave her because I am not having sex often enough with her and now it has been 9 months since I touched anyone.” We both just sat there a moment more and then Amanda got up and walked over to a small cabinet and opened the door. “I don’t know about you, but I could do with another drink. What do you want?” “Bourbon?” “Coming right up.” “Well, misery loves company. I had a roommate named Brad for about 8 months. He moved in the week that you.
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