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At himself or Elf, he wasn’t sure. Elf did not move, but sat as he had been, leaning forward, his elbows on his knees. “You know what, Jake?” he said, quietly. “I would love to suck your cock. I would fucking love it. You thinking I haven’t thought about it? That I haven’t jerked myself off imagining what it would be like to go down on you? That’s the problem—it would be so fucking easy to fall into that rhythm, to tell myself that it’s just practice, that you’re doing me a fucking favour. And I know,” he waved off Jake’s protest, “that you would never be that guy. It’s what I would tell myself. But I’m not going to be that guy, who services his straight friend. No, I promised myself when I came out to myself that sex was always going to be quid pro quo for me.” Jake didn’t entirely understand the welter of emotions in his chest as he listened to Elf’s speech. Guilt at having, however fleetingly, considered the prospect of using his friend for one-sided relief; anger at his friend. He bought me a coffee as we finally to started to settle down. I was sipping a coffee while looking at him.As we settled down, There was an awkward silence initially as we don’t know what to talk. Finally, after a couple of more minutes, he said, “You are very beautiful!” I smiled and replied thanks to him. That gave him more confidence and we finally started talking about more topics.He made me comfortable in just a couple of minutes and we started talking of all usual things. He gave me a gift and told me not to open until I reach home. I nodded yes as he said that. Now as I got comfortable with him, I also appreciated him for all of his writing skills and for his look.We were sipping coffee and he was continually talking more. He was continuously looking into my eyes. I was slowly falling for him but I was trying to avoid eye contact as much as I can to control myself. We spent a couple of hours chatting and roaming around the mall.We also had pizza in the nearest pizza restaurant.
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