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I told the Imam, a wise old Nigerian man named Ishmail Adewale, that I wanted to learn more about Islam. Khadija smiled at me, and I smiled back. Two weeks later, I converted to Islam. I had a lot to learn about my new faith. There are many practices in Islam I still find odd. Why can’t women and men pray side by side? I understand the logic behind it, given how easily distracted us men are, but surely us men can learn to control ourselves! Don’t even get me started on female circumcision in places like Yemen and Somalia. That’s barbaric and needs to end. I’m a Muslim man against female circumcision! I also found the Muslim taboo about dog ownership ridiculous. I had a dog growing up, Lucky, and I loved him more than half my relatives. Anyone who hates dogs isn’t welcome in my house, sorry but that’s how I feel. Khadija surprised me by revealing she owned a large German shepherd called Osman, and she once wanted to be a veterinarian before switching to Nursing. Wow. I wasn’t. " No please water." she asked nicely."Piss is water," No" she refused my offer."Ok"The floor bore evidence of her continued fluid loss, the pool of piss on the Formica floor covering."See you Saturday," I suggested.Her will broke."Can I have a drink of piss please." Yes of course." I said and walked round to stand before her.The piss stream hit her chin then her nose before I got the aim right and pissed straight into the back of her throat, she struggled to swallow but she drank enough of the life giving liquid to allow her to survive a while longer."Say thank you" Thank you," she croaked "Will you kill me Saturday." Yes, if you like, good bye." I left her again.I came back later, I brought her lap top computer and set it before her."Tell me the password and I will show you your emails." I suggested."Never" she answered, "it's private."I typed NEVER, and got a wrong password, I tried Victoria and it fired up."Bastard," she cried.There were messages of condolence, all her devastated.
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