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“Shit!” he moaned “this means I’ll never be able to experience an erection ever again!” “Of course you will” one of the doctors soothed. It’ll just have to be someone else’s, that’s all”.A guy is driving out in the middle of nowhere, very lost. Finally he spots two houses so he goes up to the first house and looks in the door way. He sees an old lady yanking on her boobs and an old man jerking off. He is so freaked out that he goes to the next house and says “What’s up with your neighbours?” and the owner of the house says “Oh that’s the Robinson’s, they’re both deaf. She’s telling him to go milk the cow and he’s telling her to go fuck herself!”An out of work actor gets a call from his agent one day. “I’ve got you a job” says the agent. “That’s great!” says the actor “What is it?” “Well” says the agent “it’s a one-liner” “That’s okay” replies the actor “I’ve been out of work for so long I’ll take anything. What’s the line?” “Hark I hear the cannons roar” says the agent. “Hark I hear. In these shots she has a quite pleasant smile that really softens her facial features.“I’ve been married to David for 7 years and he’s a lovely, lovely guy, and I do love him – but ... We don’t have sex much. We used to, but we don’t anymore, not much anyway. And when we do it’s very ‘respectable’. Lights out, under the covers, missionary position. He says he doesn’t want to demean me ... I’ve retreated into sexual fantasies – thinking about stuff and touching myself. I tried to tell him about the things that turn me on ... But he’s such a nicey-nice that he just sort-of pretended I hadn’t said anything.”Back to images of her at her desk. Clicking at her computer mouse, we can vaguely see the images on the screen are of bestiality.“I’ve been hanging around internet bestiality forums for a couple of years now, looking at pictures and getting jealous ... Sharing my fantasies with strangers and hoping that I will maybe meet someone with a trained dog, but I don’t know how to break the.
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