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*It was too early to get up but going back to sleep was simply impossible. All I could do was lay on my back in bed as my head buzzed with emotion and confusion.I don’t know what usually goes through the mind of a girl who had just lost her virginity – it can only be lost once after all. I suspect very few girls lose theirs to their older brothers, so all I can do is explain what went through my mind that morning.In truth, explain might be too strong a word to describe all I can say about the muddled mix of emotions that fuddled my brain, and the powerful physical memories that did the same for my body.For the first time in my life, a boy’s erect penis had been inside my vagina. More than that, it had been thrust in and out of it many times and had ejaculated inside me at least three times.I had made love; had had sex; had been fucked.I was a virgin no longer.If I’m completely honest, I experienced little in the way of sexual pleasure during my defloration, even when the initial pain. ”Suki laughed as she put on her jacket, “Oh come on you were fucking Grandpa for most of the summer vacation and another guy a few times. You can’t tell me that this almost date is what’s got you scared.” Suki’s eyes went wide. “Are you a date virgin?”I was confused, “A what? Date virgin? What the hell is that?”Suki looked flabbergasted, “A date virgin. Means this is your first date. Even though this is just an outing between friends.”I looked all around us even though I knew nobody was home and shyly said, “ Besides the sex Grandpa and I didn’t do much different than we usually do on the days we see him on vacation. Well there were the times we did go out to fancy dinners that required I wear a really nice dress. But I had already slept with him many times by then. But it’s different with Chris. I still don’t know what he wants to do with me afterwards because you broke our deal. What if he wants to hold my hand or even kiss my cheek or something.” I’m sure I blushed when I said or.
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