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That seems to be the most commonly used salutation, until closing time. Then I get to learn all of my nicknames. When ever I meet someone new I automatically say ‘What’ll ya have?’ I’ve gotten a lot of funny looks from people until I tell them what I do for a living. The interesting part of my profession is that I DO get treated as a professional. When I took my first bartending job, I had no idea that I would automatically achieve the same stature as a doctor, lawyer, or accountant, even among the members of those professions! Not only that, but on a good night I can make one-tenth of what they make without the worry of support staff, errors and omissions, or professional liability. I even helped console some of the jurors in the OJ case. They took a lot of consoling. As most professional barkeeps know, the most closely related profession is lay-psychiatrist, followed closely by detective. I’ve always thought that experienced barkeeps should automatically be accepted as inspectors. It wasn't even a perversity, it was a bad rap, but who was going to believe me with my record? My last year of college I met and fell in love with Ava. We were married two weeks after graduation and settled down to build our new life together. We had a really great marriage and were happy together. I started a great new job and we formed a new circle of friends and Ava settled in to be a housewife. After three years of marriage I fell in with a bunch of guys at work that I thought were a lot of fun and I started hanging out with them. We bowled together, played golf together and played poker every other Friday night. At one of those games I lost all that I had with me and Barry came up to me and said straight out that he liked my wife's looks, "I'll give you five hundred bucks if you'll let me fuck her."I laughed at him, "No thanks. Even if I went for it she never would and I wouldn't even ask her to do something like that."Barry said, "You won't have to. I'll give you the five.
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