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On the other hand, I was reallyattracted to Ryan for who he was - or seemed to be - when I met him. Idon't blame him for all of the things that happened. I wish some of themhad turned out differently, but I don't blame him. I was there too andI'm sure I encouraged it at times. Again, when you greet your man inyour panties and you're on your knees sucking his cock three secondsafter he walks through the door and you don't go a minute withoutstilettos on, you're setting yourself up to be viewed a certain way, soit's no wonder when it happens. When I think back to those times,everything I did was based on looking good for him. I'd wake up andexercise, work on my tan, eat dry salads, shop and try on clothes, dollmyself up for him with a sole focus on what my body, face, hair andlingerie looked like so he'd get the most from having sex with me. I'dswallow his cum and go down on him for more. It was all about being thehottest, most sexual person. There wasn't any depth most of. She has shown me the depths that she will degrade herself to me (in private as most of it XH wont allow) and because of that I love her more because she is so willing to abandon any identity and totally give herself over to me (that’s not to say I am pure as driven snow…wink wink).You should check her out, just looking at her drives me wild:(The fantasy bit)We had been speaking for months about me travelling to the States and visiting my whale in person. Her GF would have to be kept completely out of the picture, so I had booked a private holiday apartment nearby so she didn’t have to travel too far (which is handy because of what she will be wearing). The first meet of my visit was actually going to be a coffee joint in the nearby town, just so we could make sure we were both ready to go that one step further in our relationship. I dressed smart casual so as to not look too out of place (no panties of course…I do have standards hehe), however I told the whale to wear something.
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